I'll admit it, I signed up for Twitter the other day. But I'd also like to point out that I have no idea how to use it, nor do I care to spend my precious hours figuring it out. I have more important things to do on the internet ...like read Gawker's hilarious recaps of Real Housewives of New York City, download every single Chances With Wolves podcasts (seriously, have you listened to this show on East Village Radio yet?), and work of course! Yes, let it be stated for the record that I am always working.

Anyway, this Twitter thing... Martha Stewart does it and pretty much every mom and dad on the planet. Old people love this thing. But why? It baffles me. And then I read today on Mediobistro.com that some exec twittered while his house was broken into! Some of the "tweets" (quite possibly the lamest made-up word on the planet) included:

- ok, maybe I should lock my door - I swear a random dude just walked into my bathroom and I can't believe I haven't freaked out

- ok - he's still in the bathroom and Im now thinking a combo of hobo and drunk and sleepwalking dude - he seems late 20s - hmmm what next ?

- I'm thinking the hobo part cause I can smell BO - and I really am wondering why I haven't freaked the F out

- there is no TP in my bathroom - wonder if that is complicating things for him - was gonna wait for him to come out and kick him out

- haven't gone in yet ..... debating calling cops but just feel it's not needed for some reason (and probably contrary to all logic)

- ok - still haven't done anything - he is still in there - gonna setup a ustream now I think - standby

Soooooo, yeaaaaaaah. I don't really know what to say about this. But honestly, twitter's slogan is "Twitter: What are you doing?" Not only is this retarded, but I'd just like to point out that no one gives a fuck what you're doing unless they're trying to go out, get drunk (or laid) and party. So I hope, hope, HOPE that this just a passing fad. Please.